Hot Mess for Breakfast

I'm starting to realize the setbacks of dormlife/roommate living. All I ask is that I can watch TV now and then, and be able to do my daily makeup/getting ready routine without being viewed as "the one who takes forever". (I wanna put my best face forward in the world--literally--I see no shame in that, and six out of the seven days of the week, I take under 20 minutes to get ready). There's such a difference between living with friends and living with strangers who you hope to become friends with. My closest friends would know every day when Gossip Girl, Pretty Little Liars or X-Factor (BRITNEY) is on that they don't even touch that remote. With "strangers", how do you say "Um, if I don't watch this I'm pretty much going to die" without seeming psycho or just silly? How do you say "Umm can you get off Facebook for five minutes so I can actually do my homework that requires internet access" without seeming like a total bitch? SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME what do you do when you CANNOT help that your hair "sheds" a little bit, and you thought you were doing your part by swooshing it down the drain instead of leaving it ala "The Exorcist" style in the bathtub!? (Apparently I was not doing my part, I learned that today). I am in no way bitching. I'm lucky I have three super funny roommates who are also super chill about almost anything. I know there are MANY who have and/or had worse than me. (I've heard some horror stories that have included machetes....no joke). It's just one of those feelings when you thought you were doing the best you possibly could but then someone slaps you in the face saying "You really thought that was enough?". However, if I wanted to be a constant people pleaser, I'd be majoring in Hospitality Services then, now wouldn't I?

Divas can't conform. It's just not in their nature.

In other late night babbles, I'm freaking out because I can't remember half of the pom routine I learned last week that we're supposed to show to new auditionees tomorrow evening. (Did I mention I was in the front? Yeaaaah, I'm screwed) and I'm REALLY avoiding reading my damn required book for my Journalism class. The Problem of the U.S Media: U.S Communication Politics in the 21st Century. Mr. Robert W. McChesney, you could have summed your entire 300 page book in a mere sentence:

 The media is too much of a monopoly.

Now Mr. McChesney, what would you do to fix this monopolic media world we're living in? Oh....no answer....?

Awkward.

In more positive news, I've made a friend :) Someone who I think is going to genuinely be around for a while and that I don't have to pretend I have things in common with! The girls at my school, and I think in the Downtown area of Chicago in general are majorly intimidating. I'm sorry my shorts don't cut off at the same angle of yours or that my hair isn't growing out the ombre from this past summer but dammit, I AM A NICE GIRL. And that's all I need to give to anyone.

But hey, Carrie Bradshaw wasn't the most popular either. But she still loved life.

And I am doing the same.

It's two o'clock in the morning. I have ten pages left to go in my assigned journalism reading. Hey Arnold and my new (but old) iPhone are completely distracting me from getting it done. I figured "Hey I don't have class until two, I'll fool around on Instagram a bit more then finish the last few pages in the morning" WRONG. I already have to wake up earlier than my usual noon awakening because of a club event tomorrow. (Free. Food. Enough said) as well as entertaining my early bird of a friend who came to visit my boyfriend and I at school for a few days. I would try to wake up early enough to get a proper workout in to jump start my day AND energy but the days where I HAVE to wake up early (for my 8am Television Production class) I never cease to want to pass out on the classroom floor. "SCREW HOW MUCH I'M PAYING FOR THIS. LET ME SLEEP!" I want to scream! But of course, it's no one's fault but my own that I'm a night owl. The Nanny doesn't come on until midnight anyways, so naturally, I have to stay awake. I apologize for the lack of luxurious linguistic tendencies of this post. I had a long day today that included waking up at the crack of noon, exploring Chinatown, revisiting my favorite area so far--Belmont--and visiting shops, restaurants and multiple places in between. Don't think my college life is that luxurious however, I have a measly amount of money in my account that is supposed to last me until the end of October...and let's just say buying a four dollar cupcake today was a splurge. But enough of my exhausted babbling. I'll promise a more coherent post tomorrow!

                                       

The first weeks of college are all about every adult, student, adviser or even sometimes strangers asking you about your life--what you're going to do with it, how you're going to do it, and every Debbie Downer's favorite-what if you don't succeed doing it? I've only been in school three weeks (I'm attending the uuber hip but slightly under the radar Columbia College Chicago) and I've contemplated my answers to these questions multiple times. All I know is everything that I want to do is also everything that I need to do, in order for me to make my life in the longrun-worthwhile. Saying "I want to be a journalist" does not do my real list of goals justice. I want to do it all. I'm concentrating in Television Broadcast, but I don't want to be just a talking puppet reading a teleprompter. I want to grill public figures, politicians, celebrities-Soledad O'Brien style. I wanna pour my heart out in order to help hurting hearts or confused souls--like "Carrie Bradshaw". I want the entire world, as if they were part of my family, my best friend or a lover--to trust me, and I want my words, whether spoken, written, or dictated, to connect everyone to the other. By more than just a click of a button. By more than just a friend request can do. And I don't think there has anyone who has done that just yet.

Don't be fooled by my super slick introduction of myself. The title of my blog says it all. I am a hot mess! And I wake up that way everyday, it never changes. I'm classy, funky, erratic, eclectic, sweet, spicy, SASSY, humble and yet--a homebody. (Not to mention bipolar, Britney Spears obsessed, overly ambitious, an escapist...you name it). From now on it's my goal to update daily, and put effort into this blog. It's time to brand myself--show the world who I am. Whether I'm talking about food, my boyfriend, the perfect cupcake recipe, creepy construction workers, celebrities, or just daily erratic musings--every word you'll read is ME.

I hope you like her.